Bum Voyage: a friendly, cheeky guide to bottoming (that actually helps)
Bottoming isn’t a talent you’re born with; it’s a skill—like poaching an egg or choosing an Uber drop-off that isn’t four streets away. Here’s a smart, no-shame guide for gay men that’s practical, body-positive, and a little bit cheeky.
1) Mindset first: pleasure > performance
Good bottoming is teamwork, not a test. Agree your vibe (sweet and slow? athletic? cuddle-heavy?), use clear language (“let’s start with fingers,” “stay shallow,” “pause”), and keep consent active throughout. Confidence isn’t acting fearless; it’s speaking up early.
Green/amber/red shortcut
Green: “More of that,” “a bit deeper,” “that angle works.”
Amber: “Slow,” “stay there,” “smaller strokes,” “I need more lube.”
Red: “Stop.” (Not sorry. Not maybe. Full stop.)
2) Prep like a pro (without turning it into a part-time job)
The day before / morning of
Hydration + fibre: Water and a normal-human amount of fibre keep things regular and predictable (fruit, veg, oats, wholegrains). If you don’t reliably hit your fibre target, a dedicated supplement can help support consistency.
Skip heavy, greasy meals right before. Energy > food coma.
Cleanliness, not clinical
Many don’t need deep cleans. A warm shower and light external wash may be enough.
If you douche, keep it gentle: lukewarm water, small volume, don’t repeat endlessly. Over-douching can irritate. Your bum is not a car wash.
Where Purely Proud GAME ON fits (the fibre assist)
GAME ON is a fibre-rich dietary supplement formulated for bottoms: psyllium husk + oat powder with probiotics (Bifidobacterium bifidum & Lactobacillus acidophilus) and peppermint to support regular, firm and predictable movements and overall gut comfort—vegan and made in the UK.
3) Lube isn’t an apology—it’s a plan
Water-based: All-purpose, condom-safe, toy-friendly. Dries faster; keep it handy.
Silicone-based: Very slick, lasts longer; may not suit silicone toys. Condom-safe.
Hybrid: Middle ground; check labels with toys.
Avoid oils with latex condoms—they weaken latex.
Start with more than you think, re-apply before it’s needed, and yes—lube the outside and the inside.
4) Warm-up is the main event (your future self will cheer)
Cold-open penetration is the villain origin story. Try:
Breath + touch: Slow belly breaths; long exhale. Massage outside first (perineum and edges), then one finger, then two, with lube.
Training toys: A small plug or slim toy before a date helps your body “remember” the path. Size up gradually over weeks, not minutes.
Pelvic floor basics: On each exhale, let go—think “drop” rather than “push.”
5) Positions that are kind to beginners
Side-lying (spooning): Relaxed, easy to whisper “slower/shallower,” great for longer sessions.
On top (you in control): You choose angle, depth, speed. Start shallow, micro-move.
On all fours with a pillow under hips: Easy access for hands and lube; pillow tweaks the angle.
If it stings, pause, breathe, add lube, or change the angle. Pain is not a rite of passage.
6) The “clean” conversation (and why perfection is a myth)
Bodies are bodies. Even with perfect prep, the digestive system is still… alive. Have wipes and a towel on standby, keep the lights flattering, and agree beforehand that if something happens, you both handle it like adults. Shame kills fun faster than anything else.
7) Safety that doesn’t kill the mood
Condoms reduce HIV and many STIs.
PrEP reduces HIV risk (not other STIs)—many guys use both.
PEP is an emergency option within 72 hours after risk exposure.
Vaccines: Ask about Hep A/B (and mpox where relevant).
Aftercare counts: Pee, rinse, cuddle, snack, check in. If soreness lasts or you see worrying blood, pause sex and speak to a clinician.
(Info, not medical advice—local clinics are brilliant for tailored guidance.)
8) Troubleshooting, fast
Hurts at the entrance: More warm-up; slower; switch to side-lying; start with a smaller toy.
Feels “full” too soon: Shallow strokes are still sex. Angles beat force.
Can’t relax: Longer foreplay, deeper exhales, music, softer lighting; don’t schedule sex when rushed.
Dry again: Re-lube early—think of it as a top-up, not a drama.
9) The Bottoming Starter Kit (no overthinking)
Water-based lube + a silicone option
Condoms (a couple of sizes; fit matters)
Small, body-safe plug (or a graduated set if you’re training)
Wipes + towel + bin nearby
Pillow for hip positioning
Your words (still the best tool you own)
10) Culture notes (because we’re people, not positions)
Bottoming doesn’t equal feminine, submissive, or any personality type. Tops aren’t chauffeurs of pleasure; bottoms aren’t passengers. Plenty of us are switches. The hottest thing in the room is mutual curiosity and a sense of humour.